28-year-old exposes her parents' favoritism by hiding her job promotion from them so they never have a chance to make it about the Golden Child older sibling: 'Oh, your brother could afford a house at your age'

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  • AITJ for not telling my parents I got a promotion because they always make it about my brother?
  • I (28F) recently got promoted at work, something I've been working toward for years. It came with a nice raise and a title I'm proud of.
  • But I didn't tell my parents. Every time I share good news, they somehow turn it into a comparison to my older brother (31M).
  • Like when I got my apartment, my mom said, "Oh, your brother could afford a house at your age." When I graduated, my dad said, "Your brother's degree was harder."
  • So this time, I just... didn't tell them. My aunt (who knew) mentioned it at dinner last week, and my parents got upset that I "hid" something from them. My mom said, "You're punishing us for being proud of your brother."
  • I said, "No, I'm protecting my peace." My dad called that "cruel" and said I'm being "distant and bitter."
  • Now I'm wondering if I should've just told them and ignored the usual comments. AITJ for not sharing my promotion?
  • Carma... NTJ. They're just mad they didn't get another opportunity to make it about your brother. Congrats on your promotion!
  • Situation-Mediocre Why do this to yourself? Go low contact and when they question it say "so you can appreciate my brother better."
  • Grand-Jump-3216 "You're punishing us for being proud of your brother" "You people are so all about him that I could even give birth to my child and you will still find a way to say how he I could have done it much better"
  • greystad No you are not the j Unfortunately your parents have a golden child. Tell them you are not competing with your brother and do not want to be compared. Until they can respect that they will be on an information diet about your life.
  • Different One265. Notice how your parents still didn't congratulate you? That tells you all you need to know about them. People only know as much about you as you are willing to tell them. Stay silent. Stay happy.
  • Jsmith2127. Ntj. "You're still making it about my brother" Honestly I stop telling them anything, or even going to these dinners.
  • Ruthless Bunn Stop dealing with people who don't support you No law says you have to do anything with your parents when they actively harm your wellbeing.

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